Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Totally Awkward Tuesday

I'm participating in Tova's Totally Awkward Tuesdays again... and I think I have a good one this time.

I've briefly discussed this before... but my parents are not married. Daddy Dearest had an affair with a coworker a few years back, and was leading a bit of a double life for about six months that we know of. That year where my parents were still "together" but my father needed to "figure things out" was a very hard time for everyone. My mom went pretty crazy... my sister became the parent (she had to deal with other crazy stuff besides our mother also)... and I went a little nuts also. But that's a totally different story. About two years after we found out about the other woman, my dad springs on the kids (on Easter Sunday) that he's getting married. In Vegas. Mind you... we haven't met his new significant other yet. He didn't ask, and neither did we.

When my dad told me, he also asked me to go with him to Vegas. But the kicker is that the wedding was in two weeks and I only had about 5 days to make this decision because they needed to book the plane tickets. I have to admit that I almost went for a very selfish reason... I love poker. And I've never been to Vegas. But Gene made a very good point. He said to me, "You shouldn't have to be the one to tell her how pretty she looks in her dress. Do you think you're emotionally ready for that?" And I wasn't. I wasn't even emotionally ready to meet the woman, but I told my dad that before they left for Vegas... that I wanted to meet her. My brother went with me.

The four of us went to this Italian family style restaurant called Maggiano's. OUr server is a male, and he looks slightly familiar. My dad recognized him immediately.. and didn't say a damn word. My brother on the other hand can't just let anything go, and he keeps going on and on about who this person is, why does he look so familiar, etc. Finally, when our server comes back, my brother says "Didn't you used to work at TGI Fridays with my mom?" Of course he did. Of course our server knows exactly who we are and didn't say anything.

The conversation that ensued between my dad, my brother, and our server was one of the most uncomfortable things in my life.
Brother: Didn't you used to work at Fridays?
Server: Yes, I did... why?
Brother: I'm Joanie's son... I used to bus there and do door.
Server: Oh! That's why you look so familiar. How are you guys.
Daddy Dearest (very short): We're fine, thanks.
Server: How's your mom doing?
Me: She's good... she's still at Fridays. You should stop in and see her.
Server: I will. (he looks at the other woman) So is this...like...your aunt?
Daddy Dearest (even more short): No. She isn't. Joan and I haven't been together for a long time now.
Server: Oh... well... I'll be right back!

And then he ran away. And he immediately called one of my mom's friends at Fridays. I was literally biting the inside of my cheek so that I wouldn't start hysterical laughing. You could tell that my dad was upset because his entire face was beet red, but his nostrils were white. You don't want to mess with my father when he looks like that. Poor other woman and her abnormally large butt was pretty embarassed as well... it was so funny.

My dad has been with this woman for four almost five years... and in my entire life, I've only seen her for a grand total of maybe five times. Ever. She's MARRIED to my dad.


Joanie said...

When I found out you guys were going to Maggiano's, I said Nicole (another co-worker), "Wouldn't it be really funny if Jeremy was their server??" And he was!!! It couldn't have gone better if I planned it myself! The best part of that story is that Jeremy KNEW we were divorced, and just wouldn't let it go! When he came into Fridays, I gave him a BIG hug and bought him a drink!

Tova Darling said...

Oh my gosh! That's really funny! What are the chances?

Joanie said...

I saw Kaitlin on Primetime tonight! Unreal!!!

Joanie said...

There is something for you on my blog!