Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Big List of Things To Do

I feel like I'm getting overwhelmed again, with work and just everything going on. There are a lot of things that I'd like to do for myself. A lot of times that means knitting something that's just for me, or getting a pedicure, etc. But right now I'm thinking of other things.

I want to start exercising again (I know. I keep saying that.) I think it's time to give my friend Jillian Michaels another try. She kicked my ass in January, and hopefully I can stick with it this time. February kind of exploded in my face, and there was no way I could do anything besides wake up, work, go home, sleep. Eating took up too much time... haha. Maybe I won't do the 30 Day Shred 5 days a week like JM suggests. Maybe just 3 days a week. Maybe. There's also this yoga place that does classes that are just $12, so maybe once a week I'll do a yoga class. I don't know.

I started taking vitamins in hopes that my hair will grow faster. I want to whiten my teeth (yikes) but don't want to spend oodles of money at the dentist doing it. I could either do the Crest strips... or there's this system called GOSmile? Has anyone tried that? It's pricey, which is what's keeping me from buying it. Either $89 or $120 depending on which box you buy (and you have to do the actual whitening part twice a year, so $89X2 really) which is a lot of money! That's a pair of shoes! A pair of really nice shoes!

I did decide that I'm NOT doing Christmas knitting this year. No way, no how. I still haven't finished the super-secret sweater I was making for Gzilla LAST Christmas! And I need to finish my vine yoke cardigan and make my sister a blanket. Someone make a comment (a serious one, too... I mistakenly thought it was a joke) that I should knit favors for the wedding next year. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG THAT WOULD TAKE ME! No way! I'm NOT knitting 200 of ANYTHING. But I still feel like the ceiling is going to fall down on me at any second. So far no nervous breakdowns, but I'd definitely due for one.

What do you do to prevent meltdowns? My go-to is Ben & Jerry's, but if I'm trying to be all healthy and exercise, doesn't my go to "AH MY LIFE IS DRIVING ME CRAZY" fix-it not make any sense?

Monday, June 28, 2010

Need to De-Stress

The past four days have been really hard from me. Entirely unrelated to wedding planning. I don't want to get into a ton of details, but my mom has details posted on her blog if you're curious (yup. my mom blogs. and she has way more followers than I do. hurts the ego a bit. haha)

Thursday night I had maybe two hours of sleep, and then had to work all day, which wasn't smart. Unfortunately for my well being, there was no way I could have stayed home. There were too many things that I needed to do, plus the fact that I was also filling in for my boss on Friday because he needed to be home with his daughter. Everything that happened Thursday night kind of hit me on Friday, and I was a hot mess. I was sobbing. I was unnecessarily yelling at people. There was a moment where I wasn't sure how I was going to get home because I was so upset, I didn't know how I could possibly drive a car.

Saturday was a bit better because we went to the Phillies game and tailgated beforehand. I got to show off my ring, but it felt empty because all I wanted to do was go home and be with my sister. It's funny, because five years ago...even LAST year, my sister and I weren't that close. I've always loved her because she's my sister, but now I know how much I love her.

Normally when I'm stressed out and upset, I go get myself a pedicure and a pint of ice cream, put on some terrible rom-com, and forget why I'm so upset. I don't think I can do that now. I don't know how to fix this... and I always know how to fix things. I was going to make my sister a blanket, and I'm still making it for her.

How do you deal with the big stuff?

Monday, June 21, 2010

It starts.

I'm going to try my damndest to keep this from becoming a wedding blog, but I do suspect that when things get going, that is going to be the main stressor in my life and since I can't yell at actual people, I'll yell about them through my blog. But I will try VERY HARD not to do it all the time.

As things are just getting started, I'm already dizzy from numbers. I've called I think 10 different venues (not to mention the ones Daddy Dearest keeps sending me... all in Pennsylvania). So far we've made a few decisions. I've picked a dress. I've picked bridesmaids dresses but not in that color--in purple. And any of those dresses they want. FMIL is making them all (she offered. And I picked simple, I hope, dresses). And we've decided that we want to get married on a Sunday in the summer of 2011, tentatively July 3.

We have what we call The Cadillac. The Cadillac is never going to happen. But it's nice to dream. The Cadillac would be at Citizens Bank Park (that's where the Phillies play) in the Diamond Room which is behind home plate. If we had The Cadillac, the girls would wear powder blue dresses with maroon sashes and the boys would wear maroon ties (those were Phillies colors from the early 80s, and Gzilla's favorite Phillies uniform). The Cadillac is going to be balls expensive, especially since everything is a la carte and there are no "per person" package deals. And we have 112 family members between the two of us. And our poker friends. And Gzilla's college friends that we're very close with. I have like 5 friends that aren't included in poker friends. So we're talking MINIMUM 180 people. I can easily go to 250. With my eyes closed.

I've already had one potential Bridezilla moment... I called a local country club who happens to be a client of my place of business. I did not play that card. I called, requested to speak with who deals with events, and asked her nicely to email me prices/packages, etc... and I got "Well. Our packages start at $105 per person." Okay. Yes, that's out of my price range, but that isn't what I asked you. I asked you to email me information. And if you want my business, MAYBE you shouldn't be a bitch to brides. Maybe. Just a thought. And then I got a request from work to write a commercial about how great this place is to hold your wedding reception. I got a good laugh out of that.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Make it grow...

I'm sure I've complained about the horrible haircut I had 2 years ago when the "curly hair specialist" at some froofy salon RUINED my hair by doing a razor cut. Word of advice: Unless you have POKER STRAIGHT fine hair... don't ever let anyone razor cut your hair. Especially if you have a lot of curly hair. It grows in frizzy and horribly layered and takes a bajillion years to grow out.

It's been almost exactly 2 years since that haircut, and my hair is STILL not right. I've had a number of cuts since then (including one where I had a reverse bob.. short in the back, longer in the front... with long hair underneath that. Try to picture that shape. Horrible.) and I'm still not happy with my hair.

Recently, I started seeing my friend Nikki who is awesome. I love the way she cuts my hair... I love the color she uses (Goldwell. It's glossier than Redken I think) and she finally gave me a normal shape that can grow in better. Except my hair isn't really growing. I'm way past my usual 8-10 week cut (I know it's supposed to be 6 weeks. I always go longer because I'm trying to grow it. This is a vast improvement from the 2 haircuts I would get a year). My roots are horrible (they're white. Srsly) but I don't want to get it colored and NOT get it cut, but I don't want to get it cut yet.

Nikki suggested that I start taking a multi-vitamin (which I should anyway since I can't eat fruit... I would get some of the vitamins that I would normally have) as well as Biotin which says that it "promotes healthy skin and hair." Granted I've only been doing this for a week, but I haven't really seen a difference. And the funny thing is, the bottom of my hair always grows just fine... it's the TOP of my hair that's the problem. That's where the shortest layers are, and they look horrible!

And now that I have this whole big party to ACTUALLY plan instead of play-pretend plan... I don't want funky ass hair for my wedding pictures!!! So please--give me all your wives tales. How am I supposed to get my hair to grow?

Monday, June 14, 2010

The Reverse Surprise

I was really nervous about the surprise party. Gzilla kind of knew about it (knew when it was, not where it was or who was coming) but I was still very nervous. My sister came up the night before to help me (AND ALSO TO TELL ME THAT I'M GOING TO BE AN AUNT!!!!) but instead of setting up the hall the night before like i had planned, we instead stayed up late, ate junk, and watched Enchanted. Like you do.

The party seemed to be a big hit! Everyone ate a lot of the food, I picked good beer, and my friend Alli made what is quite possibly the BEST cake ever. It has dogs playing poker on it!!! She's amazing.

Shortly after we cut the cake, my mom, Daddy Dearest, and nuWife show up. Little weird seeing the three of them together, but my mom said that they decided to crash the party (didn't set off any alarms that my parents don't KNOW where the town we were in was... nor did I give them the address or anything) Then Gzilla starts giving a birthday toast, and people start shoving me to the front of the room. Someone hands me a glass of wine. My sister demands my camera and then points to a chair and tells me to sit in it.

And then Gzilla says that today is the day that we're going to get engaged and I start crying. A lot. He got down on one knee, gave me a ring, and everyone was cheering. He cried, too. Don't let anyone tell you differently.

My poker friends got us champagne flutes (Kate Spade! And they say "Mr" on one and "Mrs" on the other! So cute!!!) and a bottle of my favorite champagne (Veuve Cliquot in case you're wondering)

Things that should have tipped me off:
1. His friend gave him a bottle of champagne for his birthday.
2. Everytime I went into the kitchen, 2 of my poker friends came with me (to prevent me from seeing the champagne in the fridge)
3. My parents
4. My sister getting my camera and demanding to sit

But, no. I'm dumb. I had absolutely no idea. Apparently he got the ring while I was in Ireland. Went to the jewelry store (a real one... NOT one in a mall) and picked out the diamond himself. I'm a little really excited, not gonna lie. And no, I haven't even THOUGHT of a date yet.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Party Preparations

Okay, we're getting down to go-time for the big surprise extravaganza this Saturday. I have harassed most of the people who haven't RSVPed. I think about 30 people are coming, which is good. Too many to fit in my house, enough to justify renting a hall. Gzilla's mom is taking care of the food for me because she's amazing. My sister is helping me decorate and stuff because she's amazing.

Here's what I have left to do:
* Buy decorations
* Set up tables/chairs at the hall
* Decorate
* Update my iPod (well we need to have music! Updating my iPod means taking off the Glee and the musicals and putting on stuff like Better Than Ezra, Billy Joel, Nirvana, and a plethora of Scottish & UK bands that Gene is gaga about)
* Buy beverages (soda, beer, iced tea vodka, lemonade)
* Put my face on
* Par-Tay!

Am I missing anything? I'm not missing anything, right? This party is going to be grand, right? I feel like I'm forgetting something. I forgot to tell my boss (who is close with Gene) but I did that. He's busy and can't get a baby sitter for the cutest little girl EVAR. All our poker friends are coming. We have poker chips. I still need to get fresh decks. We're having a chocolate cake (my friend Alli is making it. She's the shit) because Gene loves chocolate cake and because our poker friend who passed away in November 2008 always brought chocolate cake. That's why we called him The Chocolate Cake Man.

We're having a lot of dinner food. And cake. Do you think I should get other snack-y food? Like chips and salsa, cheese, fruit, anything like that? Because I'll get some of that, too. Goddamn parties are expensive. He better appreciate this.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Officially Gleeked Out

I don't know WHY I didn't watch Glee when it was first out. Seriously, this show was made so that I could be a huge obnoxious fan of it. I think I didn't watch it because I was pissed at FOX for cancelling Dollhouse, and DON'T THINK I'VE FORGOTTEN! I haven't!!! But I'll stil watch and love Glee.

Sue Sylvester may very well be my favorite person in the entire world. Every time she says something, I want to immediately put it on a tshirt and wear it around proudly with "Go Cheerios" across the back of it. And every time Brittany says something remarkably stupid (you know dolphins are just gay sharks) same thing. I also need a t-shirt that says "I'm like Tinkerbell, Finn... I need applause to LIVE!"

Remember way back when American Idol was cool in like 2003? And musical success was measured by if you had your own American Idol-themed episode? Well, times have changed. Now musical success is measure by whether or not New Directions (or their arch nemesis Vocal Adrenaline) covers your song in an episode. And musical-theatre success is measured by whether or not you appear as a guest star in an episode of Glee (as yourself or someone else, say a washed-up, alcoholic, former glee club superstar).

All of this bad press has been coming out recently about Lea Michelle about how she's a diva, hard to work with, kinda bitchy, etc. Who cares! She's fabulous! And I'm sorry, but have you MET anyone in theatre? This ridiculously talented girl started out on Broadway (in the biggest musical of two years ago: Spring Awakening). ANYONE who works in theatre has to be a bit of a diva. It's how you survive. That's one of the reasons I quit... I couldn't be cut throat. It's a cut throat business. Film is like that too, but it's all passive aggressive because you still need to come out on top. "Hard to work with" in theatre is code for "I hate her because she has so much talent." Seriously. And I do kind of hate Lea Michelle because her voice is so amazing. No one should have a voice that versatile.

Seriously though.. if anyone finds any t-shirts with Sue Sylvester or Brittany quotes (or especially the Tinkerbell one) PLEASE LET ME KNOW!! I need them all.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

I'm turning into a domestic goddess. Help.

I got really excited yesterday, because I bought a new steam mop. I know that there are a variety of steam mops out there now, and after much research and asking knitterly friends on ravelry, I decided on the Shark Steam Mop. There are 2 version, and I picked the larger of the two.

My kitchen floor is this really ugly peach linoleum type floor? And since I bought my house, there have been these two fairly large grey stains that have become one with the linoleum. No amount of floor cleaner could get these puppies out. So I tried my steam mop on the stains. I have a completely peach floor now. I've never in my 2 years living in this house ever seen my floor that clean before ever. AND this thing cleans hardwood, so when we finally get our floors redone (we have hardwood floors throughout our house because our house is 80+ years old) I can use my steam mop!!!

Seriously, help me. I'm getting excited about a MOP? That's one step above getting excited about a vaccuum cleaner. Last month I got excited about our new iron. I'm still a terrible house keeper. But now I'm a terrible house keeper but with really clean and sanitized kitchen and bathroom floors.

Friday, June 4, 2010

I'm Mostly Useless

Why did I join a kickball team? Why did I think that was a good plan? It wasn't!

At my game on Wednesday... I pulled BOTH of my quads. Do you know how hard it is to walk when BOTH of your quads are screaming in pain? Really hard. It's even harder to walk down stairs. Up stairs, surprisingly not so bad.

I stretched before the game, too!! But in the outfield, I was going after a line drive (?) and pulled my left quad. Then when it was my turn to kick, I pulled the right one. And I was out of the game by the 2nd inning. And crying. I'm kind of a big wuss. BUT it hurt A LOT!!!

I listened to my track coach friend who is on the team and I iced my quads and stretched them... stretching them by the way hurt like a bitch. My poor next door neighbors probably thought I was being attacked. Or dumped. And to top it all off, I was by myself because Gzilla was at the Stanley Cup game watching the Flyers KICK ASS!! (Claude Giroux... I love you.)

At least I can walk now. It still hurts, but it's more of a muscle burn from exercising rather than from muscle strain, muscle pull, whatever it is. My track coach friend said that they aren't pulled, they are tweaked. Whatever that means. It feels freaking pulled to me!!!!

I'm trying to do some things to cheer me up and help me forget that my legs hurt all the time. First night, it was muscle relaxers and Glee. Yesterday, it was finishing the newest Sookie Stackhouse novel and whiskey. What shall it be tonight and the rest of the weekend?? Tonight, another Flyers win would really cheer me up, so if my boys in orange could do that for me, I'd really appreciate it.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

A Dream Worth Fighting For

I don't know if I've confessed this to the blogosphere or not, but one of my biggest goals in life is to be a publish romance novelist. Only problem? (it's a minor one, really...) I haven't actually finished writing anything.

I've started maybe 3 or 4 stories, and I hate every single one of them. Instead of just continuing on and editing later, I reread everything I've written and edit it, and then decide it's crap, and erase it.

Since returning from Ireland, I'm on another writing kick. Originally, my best friend was going to be the subject of my romance novel. Because seriously, the things that happen to her and the wackos that she finds is just too funny for words. And I think that's the problem. Also, I can't figure out how it ends. So I've decided that her fictional story is NOT going to be my first novel, but rather my second. Or third.

So my first is just going to be a novel without any real borrowing from real-life experiences. Some borrowing, but not REAL borrowing.

Originally when I started this novelist kick, it was something that my therapist (what, I had a therapist) suggested that I do to deal with my parents' divorce when I was in college. Because seriously that story... if it happened on television... would make one HELL of a comedy.

I just hope that I can stick with it... enough that I actually finish it.