Tova Darling always does this great thing every Tuesday called Totally Awkward Tuesdays, and I always think it's a lot of fun. I've posted a few... but there's one awkward story (and this one is pretty darn embarrassing) that I had blocked from memory until I read Tova's today. So, following in your middle school awkwardness, here is mine.
My friends and I used to use code words for the boys we had crushes on. That way we could write "I heart potato" or whatever instead of the boys name... and no one but our friends would be the wiser. So I had this HUGE crush on this boy Andy (looking back now... ew.) and my friends and I decided that his nickname would be "carrots." I also managed to get ahold of these sticker labels with Looney Toons characters on them... and I always used the Bugs Bunny ones because they had carrots on them. And I wrote "I heart Carrots" all over my pencil case. Not my books though.. Catholic school didn't tolerate writing on covered text books. That's a no-no.
Now, this was when I was in the 7th grade... and we shared homerooms with the 8th graders. There was one kid in my homeroom (and I've honestly completely forgotten his name) who was a complete jerkface. He would torture anyone who walked past him. And he saw my pencil case... and grabbed it... and then started harassing me about the "I heart Carrots" written all over the place.
And this was how the rumor started when I was in GRADE SCHOOL about how I would, um, pleasure myself with vegetables. Carrots were my favorite... but you know, bananas and cucumbers would work too. This went right with the rumor that I was a lesbian. That one was started by my friends because I wouldn't smoke at the age of 12, but that's a completely different story that is not so awkward, just mean. So yeah. I think eventually people just forgot about it... it followed me to 8th grade, but by the time I got to high school the rumor had pretty much disappeared. I was too shy to stand up for myself, unfortunately, and would rather have had this awful rumor than have this boy know that I liked him. We didn't exactly run in the same circles.