Wednesday, June 10, 2009

The End of the Wedding Crazy. For now.

I'm been a little MIA lately... partly because of the wedding crazy and partly because work has been a bit of a nightmare. and the combination of the both makes me want to drink tequila out of the bottle.

The final wedding in the wedding crazy went surprisingly great! I KNEW that Gene was going to have to escort the girl my ex cheated on me with...and I was right. I also knew that my ex was going to be there with his girlfriend whom I adore. That was mostly fine. Only slightly awkward. The worst part of the whole night was the fake "Oh, how are you? You look great.. blah blah blah" that I got from the ex's friends who never liked me when we dated, which was fine because I didn't like them either.

The dress went well, I think. I did one BIG mistake though that no one noticed. I was clipping the seams on the inside of the dress so that it would lay nicer on the midriff, and I accidentally snipped a tiny little V into the skirt part of the dress. I had no idea what to do.. so I didn't do anything. I can't glue it together.... I'm still trying to figure out what to do... but I know that no one noticed (or at least Gene, and he notices everything--because he would have said "what did you do there?" and point it out, which is great because he's generally honest about my clothing)

The wedding actually looked pretty small. It was outdoors (hence my fluffy hair... it was straight. and then humidity happened. That picture was after the wedding back at the hotel. You can't even tell that I'm BLASTED!) and in my friend's backyard. Of one of their houses. I think they have three? That I know of? Her parents have a freakish amount of money. As in what they spent on photography for the night (3 photogs and 2 videographers) is about what a lot of people spend on the entire wedding. But they could save money on the venue. They instead spent it on food (yum), pictures, an ice sculpture of a monkey with a Shakespearean collar (for serious) and apparently booze. The open bar was the whole night... and they had good vodka. and they made my cosmos with cointreau instead of triple sec. Oh yeah.

But that brings me to my fear and aversion to having a wedding. I just think it's so STUPID to spend this much money on one day. Yes, I realize that it's a "once in a lifetime" thing... but my problem with weddings is that by the end of it, it's rarely about the bride and groom. It's about what everyone else wants. If I told my father that I wanted a barbeque with chicken, ribs, and potato chips, he'd want me to have lobster thermador and asparagus wrapped with prosciutto. I've said before that we want to go to Hawaii and come back married. And this plan has been adapted a few times. For a while, we decided that Vegas would be cool. This has apparently been revised yet again (at 2am last night, no less) to the Caribbean. As in St. Thomas or something similar. It would have to be one of the US islands... the flight would be much shorter, and therefore less expensive, and more people would probably be able to afford it if they so choose. And maybe we'll have some kind of family gathering before or after (super super informal. Cannot stress how informal. I mean like family reunion informal) to say "hey, we're getting married isn't that great."

I know that my mother supports me. She isn't the one I worry about. Daddy dearest has issues because he wants to put on this air that we're all rolling in money. But he isn't paying for my wedding, I am. And I work in radio. Unless you own a station, you make ZERO money in radio. And Gene's parents just want us to get married in a church, which we don't really give a shit about. We were bascially Baptized Catholic and that's it. I go to church on Christmas Eve, and even then it's iffy if I actually go.


Anonymous said...

New to the blog today!
1. To fix the dress, get some iron-on tape or iron-on hem facing, lay the dress with the clipped spot flat on the ironing board & iron on a small piece of the tape. This will keep the clipped spot from growing (& obviously it isn't very noticeable). Been there, done that!
2. Your wedding should be exactly whatever it is that YOU & YOUR FIANCE want it to be. More power to you if you go somewhere & come back married - you can always have a party to celebrate afterwards, & as my daughter found when planning her wedding last year, decor & cakes & catering (if you decide to use them for the party) are cheaper if the vendors don't know it's for a wedding! HER wedding was all about the caterer/food, which is what she wanted. Everything else was toned down but exactly suited her & her DH.


Joanie M said...

If I ever decide to get married again, I think I just want to invite everyone to a BBQ and say hey Guess What! Today's our wedding day! So, if you get invited to a BBQ at my place and I tell you to wear a sundress, you'll know you're my maid (matron?) of honor. :) (wouldn't your sister shit a brick if I did that? LOL)

Fidgeting Gidget said...

We struggled with the wedding thing before we got hitched, too. In tne end, we decided to do it close to home, as I still have grandparents around that couldn't travel too far, and we didn't get married in the Catholic church because we got married outdoors and no priest in our diocese would marry us. We did it how we wanted with a few little compromises. I'm sure whatever you guys decide to eventually do will be awesome!

Ali said...

I hear you. You want your wedding to be special without being ridiculously overpriced and over-the-top. It's almost like Bar and Bat Mitzvahs. If you do too much at the party, then you sort of forget why you're there, which is to celebrate the actual person.

RecoveringActor said...

Thanks for the advice et!! I am definitely going to have to try that... I have some iron-on interfacing that I used for the midriff left. So I don't even have to purchase any!

becklette said...

fuckin' weddings, man. i cannot tell you how often THAT fiasco comes up in therapy...

it's was lovely, though, wasn't it?

Sara said...

Yes, I am bored, and yes, I am going to comment on more of your entries. Oh well.

Don't feel like your wedding has to be a money suck--I know lots of people who have had low-key weddings, and they've been great. It's YOUR day (and Gene's) and you should be happy--it's not worth stressing out beforehand and stressing on the day because things might not be "perfect". My friend Angela is having a pig roast in her fiance's backyard! It'll be good no matter what you decide to do.

PS Hawaaaiiiii go to Hawaii! :P