The Ex.

There's this guy I dated all throughout high school, and granted, it's been about eight years since we've broken up, but there are things that he did to me that still have me completely messed up today. Between this guy and my father, I don't know which one gave me more trust issues. I'm not going to use this exes name. Instead, we're going to call just call him The Ex, because out of all my exes, he's the only one I'll ever bitch about. One I'm still very good friends with (even though he cheated on me), one is a youth minister and married with babies (even though when we dated he was goth. that's just amusing), one is too self-obsessed to be angry, and one I'm kind of friends with, but he's just plain weird.

Basic backstory with The Ex... we dated for almost two years when I was a junior and senior in high school. He was a senior when I was a freshman, but he moved across the country to go to school. We dated while he was across the country, and our relationship was amazing then. He came home in the summer and for Christmas. Our first Christmas together, his Christmas present to me was that he was moving back home after graduating with his associates degree. I wasn't excited enough about it, and he got mad at me. I guess I just assumed that he would be moving home. He would always get upset with me whenever I didn't exclaim with joy every time he called or came home. I guess he expected me to cry. Whatever.

One summer, there was this incident. He had just come home, but I had made plans that day already to spend the night at a friends. We started drinking (I was 17... bad plan, I know) and the girls decided to go swimming, except I had no bathing suit. So we decided to go skinny dipping and not tell the boys. The boys followed us. I told The Ex, and he got all kinds of upset, and rightly so. But didn't break up with me. Instead, we stayed together for a whole year and he held it against me every chance he got. He made me feel so low and so bad about myself... he had me completely trained. I even slept with the jackass so that he'd trust me again. Huge mistake. For eight years, I've wanted to have it out with this guy. At least twice a month, he'd try to break up with me, and I'd beg him not to. Until the last time. He said something cryptic like "I think you know what I want, and I think you want the same thing" and I finally said, "Fine. Never talk to me again." and hung up. Later on that summer, he showed up at my first college party (we called it Kidnapping, it was a tradition in the theatre program I was in) and made me feel awful. I left that party after 10 minutes. I never ahd my chance to really tell him how I felt, and since then I've never been able to really trust people because I always feel like they're trying to control me.

Recently, he showed up on one of my various networking sites... and he started passive aggressively posting cryptic things about me on it. The guy still acts like he's 15. He's 28. I tried being nice earlier and extending an olive branch... because it bothers me that someone hates me as much as he does, despite the fact that I have every right to want to punch him in the face. He ignored my olive branch. So the second time, after the passive agressiveness, I sent him another message that was like "Look, asshole, if you want to be all passive aggressive about me, then fine, but grow the hell up and say it to my face you coward." And other nasty things about how he's controlling and how he's totally screwed me up in the head.

This was his response: Hello. What r u talkin about? No one said anything about fighting.I was told people were talking about me and there is no reason for it. If some one has something to say about me then say it to me. Seems as tho you are trying to start a fight, however i am not. So there will be no fight. Sorry. I don't appreciate people talking about me. Let's be grown up. Aside from all that crap what's new with u?

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT???? AND THEN! After a very confused "what the hell?" response from me, I get this: There isn't hatred towards you.It's in our past so let's just leave it there. Yea there are a few things unresolved but it was a long time ago so I put that stuff behind me and move on from anything that bothers me in life. Radio huh? As in a radio station on the radio? That's sweet. My brother did that for a couple years. Speaking of acting I ran into Maria not too long ago, she's traveling all over the place acting. What fruit can't u eat? I'm allergic to shrimp but I still eat it... yea i break out in rashes n itch alot but that's why I bring Bendryl to Red Lobster.....last week it did not work and I paid the price. It was good tho.

One of two things is happening here. Either 1. He has matured and is a nice human being. I do not trust this one bit. I know him better than to think that he is a nice human being and has matured. Which leaves 2. This is his passive aggresive plot to have him come out of this smelling like a rose and make me feel awful about myself yet again. I responded to his last reponse with a very nice message. This was a few weeks ago. I'm still waiting for a response. This supports my #2 theory. He hasn't gotten over it, he just doesn't want to take any responsibility, and he wants to come out looking like the better person. I hate people like that.