Three Easy Ways to Get a Girl

I don't know what's in the water lately... but over the past three or four days, I've been publicly hit on three times. And not by people I'd want to hit on me either.

First, I was up at my old college again... at the place where they've been hiding the liquor store (but I was there to get coffee, not booze.) with a friend of mine. This (visibly drunk) "gentleman" walked up to us, bent over sideways so that he could "check us out" with his entire body (not just his head... his entire torso) and said, "Hey Ladies!" followed by a sexual grunt.

That's exactly how to get me to make out with strangers in public, in case you were wondering.

Then yesterday, I was hit on TWICE while driving my car. The first time, I was at a stoplight in front of this sketchy looking corner store, and this guy started screaming, "Hey, miss! Miss! Smile for me. Just one smile. C'mon, smile for me. Hey miss--smile for me." I didn't even turn my head... because I was desperately trying not to burst out laughing.

Then... at another stoplight a few blocks later, some guy on a bike (oh yeah...) did some cat call... and said something. It was so inappropriate that I've blocked it from memory. But at that point, I couldn't stop myself from laughing. It was just too hilarious.

Do guys seriously think that works? My favorite has to be the "Hey, ladies" lush. Because I think he honestly thought that one or both of us was going to go with him. The only men who can get away with yelling inappropriate things at me? Toddlers.