I am going to cry.

Not in a bad way. I hope I don't cry in a bad way.

Tonight, I'm going to see The Wizard of Oz at a local theatre.. it's a national tour... and I'm slightly obsessed with The Wizard of Oz. When I was in high school, I played Dorothy Gale. It was my first lead role... and I had so much fun doing it. We even took the show on a high school theatre competition, and I won Best Actress. I think I still have the little trophy somewhere at my mom's house. I was so proud of that show. It was THREE hours long. THREE. Because we put EVERYTHING back in. There are a bunch of songs originally written for the movie that were taken out (the main one being "The Jitterbug," which is a GREAT song. We did swing dancing, and I got to do swing lifts! It was awesome!)

But anyway. I'm very attached to this show... I have TONS of Wizard memorabilia... I know tons of random facts about the book, the 1939 filming (like: did you know that Shirley Temple was originally offered the role of Dorothy Gale? But they decided to make the main character 14 instead of 8, so they went with Judy Garland. And originally she had long blonde curly hair... but it made her look like a sexpot, so they changed it to pigtails) Lots of random trivia.

My predictions for this evening is that the show is going to be awesome, but that I will cry the entire time. I cry at theatre. And not even sad theatre. I cry at happy theatre.. because it's pretty. I cried at Annie Get Your Gun because Bernadette Peters was in it. When she walked onstage...I burst into tears. I cried at Beauty and the Beast during "Be Our Guest"...because it was really pretty. A GIANT CAKE came out of the stage... and they were doing a kickline on a revolving giant cake onstage... and then two giant champagne bottles came out of the side of the proscenium and had sparks coming out of them like champagne bubbles... EXACTLY LIKE THE CARTOON. It was really pretty. Spectacle makes me cry, ok?? Also I cried during Beauty and the Beast because Andrea McArdle was playing Belle... and she was the lead in the first professional play I ever saw, Les Miserables, in Philadelphia. She played Eponine, and she was amazing. I'd watch Andrea McArdle play a tree.

I cried throughout The Light in the Piazza because the music was so gorgeous. I cried when I saw Rent because I was just so excited to be seeing it. I did not cry during Phantom of the Opera. Because I saw the worst Christine in the history of Christine's. I will never forget her name, and I refuse to watch anything that she's in. I cried during Wicked because I love the show and the book, and I thought that it was an absolutely amazing concept, and I loved that it didn't change the core story of The Wizard of Oz at all. I cried during 9 to 5 (WHICH WAS SUCH A GOOD SHOW!! AND I HATE THAT IT WAS TAKEN OFF BROADWAY!!! THAT WAS SUCH A BAD DECISION!!! THOSE WOMEN AND MARC KUDISCH ARE AMAZING!!!) because the women are amazing, and being that close to Allison Janney (because I was totally in the front row) was giving me breathing problems. I cried during Spamalot and Avenue Q because I was laughing so damn hard.

I even cry when I hear certain songs from shows. I heard "As Long As Your Mine" from Wicked in the car this morning while listening to the lovely Christine Pedi on Sirius 77, Broadway's Best, and tried to singing, but couldn't because I got choked up. I cannot sing certain songs because I get too emotionally invested in them. I'm such a big emotional dork. I tried to sing "I'm Still Hurting" from The Last Five Years when I was in college... but couldn't make it through the song. I finished it. And there wasn't a dry eye in the damn house... because I SOBBED through the second half of the song.

This is part of the reason I stopped acting. I have NO problem getting emotionally invested. I have a problem becoming TOO emotionally invested...

Oh, Childhood...

My friend Sara and I were supposed to see The Invention of Lying this weekend, but after spending JUST a little more time in JoAnn's Fabrics than we intended (stupid busy cutting table on Saturdays...) and being a bit (ok, really) tired, we decided that we'd rather watch a movie at my house instead. But not just any random movie. The Dark Crystal.

Now. My mother swears up and down that I loved this movie as a child... and I watched it all the time. I don't remember this movie at all. But I do think that Jen the Gelfling looks suspiciously like the muppet version of Link from the Zelda games. And Kira the Gelfling is a little Zelda-y to me. But that's besides the point. I have a very hard time believing that I LURVED this movie as a child, because, well THIS IS SO NOT A CHILDREN'S MOVIE! IT'S TERRIFYING!!!

Whenever I watched the Sesame Street Christmas Special... you know the one I'm talking about. Everyone goes ice skating... and they are all holding hands and spinning in a giant circle.. and Oscar the Grouch is on the end... and someone (I believe it was Big Bird... that giant yellow bastard) lets go of Oscars hand and he goes FLYING across the ice and falls down a flight of stairs? I would SCREAM because I was afraid that Oscar was dead. Don't you think that I'd be effing TERRIFIED of those creepy Skeksis??? They are like the super evil cousins of the Fire Gang from Labyrinth.

There are some movies that I distinctly remember as a child, though. I used to watch The Incredibly Mr. Limpet every Sunday. Though... I don't remember it being about World War II AT ALL!! That went WAY over my 4 year old head. We also had this tape that had the Smurf Christmas special, all of the Charlie Brown holiday specials, and this weird really old Garfield Halloween special on it? Until my mother unceremoniously taped over it. I still haven't completely forgiven her for that. My brother and sister and I watched that every single Christmas morning. That and The Christmas Toy... if you watch The Christmas Toy and then watch A Toy Story... they're the SAME EXACT MOVIE except The Christmas Toy takes place on Christmas Eve, and that's it. But they're the SAME EXACT MOVIE.

The other tape that was destroyed by my mother was Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass... four hours of Lewis Carroll craziness starring Natalie Gregory as Alice. And it had EVERY person who was ever famous in the 80s ever. It was a made for tv movie musical... and it was pure genius. I compare every other version of Alice in Wonderland to this version, and none of them even come close. It's also the most accurate to Lewis Carroll's book. This movie has Carol Channing, Ringo Starr, Imogene Coca, Cid Ceasar, Anthony Newley, Sammy Davis Jr, Red Buttons, Ann Gillian, Sally Struthers, Pat Morita, Scott Baio... seriously... every person who was famous in the 80s. And the Jabberwocky. If you think I was terrified of Oscar... that damn Jabberwocky gave me some serious nightmares.

Seriously.... I should be a paid wedding crisis averter consultant. Or something.

The wedding was not without conflict. But! I did not have to diffuse any fights... nor did I have to kick any of my fellow bridesmaids in the teeth. So. I say success.

The conflicts happened prior to the wedding. I get a phonecall from the bride two days before the wedding... "I need you to stay with me tomorrow night." Okay. I was supposed to stay with our other cousin, but the bride wanted us to stay with her, so we did. With the baby. Hence, why she wanted us to stay. So I got to entertain a one month old all evening.



The bride and I stayed up and tried to get that little bugger to fall asleep. He finally did around 12:45. But then he stayed asleep until almost 6:00! It was glorious. Five whole hours of sleep.

The day before the wedding, my cousin who was a bridesmaid with me picked me up from work.. and she was NOT a happy person. Because her bridesmaids dress RIPPED!!! THAT MORNING!!! She was seriously freaking out. A friend of hers had added this lace part to a strapless bodice because she didn't want it to be strapless, but didn't like the other separate tops that David's Bridal had. And her friend did a good job, and if she didn't have basically 5 days to design and sew it, it probably would have been fine... but stupid David's Bridal took SIX MONTHS to send it to my cousin, and she got it about a week before the wedding. So she wasn't happy with the neckline. In addition to it being ripped. So what do I do when we get back from having our hair done at the salon? I bust out my aunt's sewing machine... and fix that bitch. The problem was that lace has zero give... and the top fit my cousin beautifully, but it just had no stretch, so that's why it ripped. But I saved the day.



And you couldn't really tell that I fixed it the day of the wedding.

After that, everything was pretty much smooth sailing. None of the groomsmen were in the right place during the ceremony (which is not really much of a surprise) and the priest completely skipped an entire reading... but all in all, it was a very nice day. My dress was awesome.



Everyone asked me where the one I made was...

And it starts.

I decided to wear the dress that I was wearing to the rehearsal tonight to work. Usually, I wear jeans and a t-shirt or something similar to work. And sneakers. Not royal blue, classic cut, awesome Ann Taylor dress. And black stockings. And patent black shoes. And a French manicure. Generally, this is not work attire for me.

So far, these are the comments I've received:

You got all dressed up for flu shots today? (oh yeah, we're getting flu shots today. This is the one I've received most often)

What, are you switching to sales now? Going on sales calls?

You didn't have to get all fancy just for me!

And my personal favorite...

Why the hell are you wearing a dress?

Mind you... I have ZERO makeup on. I do however have all of my makeup with me (and that's not even really an exaggeration. I have I think 80% of my makeup in this giant tote bag... and the tote bag is at least 10 lbs. I do have SOME hair products in there, but not a lot).

And already this morning? My friend drove me to work... I got to work, and looked in my makeup tote bag, and lo and behold my makeup brushes are SO NOT IN THERE... they are, in fact, at home. So I ran outside in my heels and ran after my friend's car to see if they fell out of my makeup tote, and they didn't. So we had to drive all the way back to my house so that I could get my makeup brushes. Otherwise, I'm in big all trouble. I ended up being almost an hour late to work because of it, but I would have been in WAY bigger trouble tomorrow if I had zero makeup brushes. So thank GOODNESS I looked in that bag before tomorrow morning. That would have been really bad. Because I would have been more than an hour away from home, not 20 minutes.

In the closet at work is my bridesmaids dress, my makeup tote, and my extra clothes for tonight and clothes to wear to the salon tomorrow morning. Even though I was a Junior Bridesmaid for my aunt and uncle like 14 years ago, this is my first big time bridesmaid ordeal. And I'm already prepping to have to troubleshoot something. I'm really good at troubleshooting. I'm good at diffusing possible explosive situations quietly without other guests knowing... I'm good at fixing people's dresses when they break (though I don't have my usual wedding kit with me. Needle & thread, clear nailpolish, hairspray, bobby pins, and safety pins. I was too worried about makeup and stuff). And I'm also good at calming down brides. I had to do that for my one and only freelance makeup job. For a complete stranger. Bride was FREAKING out and I managed to calm her down, hide her tattoo from her family, AND keep her mom on track. I seriously almost felt like a bridesmaid that day with all my troubleshooting.

Tomorrow I have to deal with infant duty (the bride has a one month old. He's the cutest freaking baby ever and has the most hair I've ever seen on a baby. It looks like a toupe), make sure the groom's sister doesn't make the bride cry, and make sure that everyone's makeup looks good. Especially since our photographer is our cousin's boyfriend... and I don't think he's done a wedding before... and I want to make sure that our makeup will show up in the pictures. Hopefully.. once things get started, I'll be able to drink my cosmos and have a good time.

I'm just resting my eyes, I swear...

I think my not stopping has finally took it's toll.

I'm sitting at my desk desperately trying not to fall asleep. I have not had a day off of work since Labor Day. That was my last day off. Labor Day. And Saturday, aka the craziest day of my life thus far, was just as crazy as expected.

I did have a lot of fun, and I did learn a lot of tricks from the national artist that I worked with from Bare Escentuals, but I wish I didn't have to work 11.5 hours. Standing for 11.5 hours? Not good for my back, FYI. Thank goodness for ibuprofen.

I feel like I'm asleep right now. In fact, I actually put my head down for a few seconds just because it was so hard keeping it up. And even if I wanted to go home early today, I can't. Because the ONE car that we have is in the shop today... balls to that. Something is wrong with the lights. I'm hoping it's something simple and not some wacky eletrical problem. But, still. I did get a decent night's sleep after Crazy Saturday. I still think there's a lot I could catch up on, though. And at least I don't have to finish the bridesmaids dress this week. I'm pretty sure I'd have some kind of mental breakdown and disappear for 3 days if that happened. I did that once in college. I had a minor mental breakdown and disappeared for a day.

Right now, I'm looking forward to my mani-pedi for the wedding... and getting my hair did. Though, because of the Keratin treatment, I can only use specific styling products in my hair. My stylist at this salon is going to hate me. Because I'm totes bringing my own products with me and having her use those. I can't risk this salon not having the stuff I need.

Autumn, how I love thee

My favorite season is here. I know it was here at the end of September, but I never *feel* like fall until October. I get to pull out boots... and dark denim... and lovely sweaters... and scarves.

My favorite part about fall? The smell. I love the smell of autumn. And October has the best smell. At least in my part of the east coast. There's nothing like the smell of pumpkin, burning leaves, bread, and apples. That's what October smells like to me. My other favorite smell? The air right before it's about to snow. It mimics October just a little bit. And I love it.

Of course my allergies hate me. I even took my allergy medicine when I was supposed to (before bed) and STILL woke up congested and sneezy. Oh well. I'll take a bit of the sniffles in exchange for my favorite month and my favorite time of year.

Today is my favorite day in a long while. Generally, I hate Fridays, because on Fridays I have a crap ton of stuff to do at work. But there's not a lot that can bring me down today. I have my chunky amber ring on... my dark AT jeans... a super cute sweater... and a teal, purple, and orange necklace that ties everything together. I'm meeting my best friend in Philadelphia tonight, and we're having dinner at one of my favorite restaurants, then we're going to a yarn store around the corner to meet Jared Flood! and then we're going to see Billy Crystal do a one man show. It could not get better. It really couldn't!

I haven't decided if I'm getting real dinner, or if I'm getting banana french toast. It's my favorite dish that this restaurant has, and it's so damn good.

For shame...

I have a confession. I'm not finishing the dress for my cousin's wedding. I copped out. I bought a dress.

But Ann Taylor is having the "best sale ever" and it REALLY GOOD!! 40% off of everything marked down? UM, YES.

For my dress, I still need to handsew the lining into the bodice, put in the zipper, and hem. And make a belt. And wash/press. And snip all of my threads. And take out my stay stitching in the skirt because you can see it. That's a good 6-8 hours of sewing still ahead of me. And I'm working at ULTA tonight... and Saturday ALL day, and Sunday ALL day. And I need Gene's mom's help on the zipper because I hate them and usually pay someone to do it for me... and she's away tomorrow until Sunday. AND the neckline is funny and we need to fix it. Which leaves THE WEEK LEADING UP TO THE WEDDING to work on it.

So, no.

This is the dress that Ann Taylor blessed me with:



HOW PRETTY IS THAT? So pretty. So, if I have two little black dresses... then I have two little black dresses. Late last night, I got the email from Ann Taylor that they're having the "best sale ever" so I looked... JUST TO SEE what black dresses they had. And this one was $59. Not bad at all. So I was considering it. I tried calling my cousin, but she didn't answer. I added it to my cart. And my cart said $35.88.

UM, WHAT? THIRTY FIVE DOLLARS? HELL YEAH!

So I called Gene's mom to ask her advice and she said "oh you need to buy that dress." So I did. I had to put 3 day shipping on it so it would get here in time, but with expedited shipping... it was still less than the price I thought I was going to pay for it.

This dress better look good...