Hello. My name is XX. I am an elderly person. I need a job. I need the number for ABC Company. I do not have a computer. I need a phone number. Goodbye.
It always amazes me that people think that because I work for a local radio station that I know every business and that I have all the time in the world to look up phone numbers for other businesses for you. That's what information is for. I'm not information. I write commercials. Now, I did happen to know what business he was talking about. And in the hour and a half it took me to get out of the meeting I was in, this gentleman called back FOUR TIMES. He kept harassing our receptionist!!! I swear to Pete, people make me crazy.
But that's not the best voicemail ever. The best voicemail ever was received by the box office at my college theatre back when I was a freshman or a sophomore.
Hello. This is XX. I need to speak with a real person. I keep calling and no one is there. I need to get my tickets. If a tree falls in the middle of the forest, and no one is there to hear it, how do I know if I get my tickets? Can I talk to a real person? I need to speak with a real person now. Hello?