Erin Go Eff Yourself.

I get testy sometimes. Ok, a lot of times. Which you could probably tell from the fact that my favorite word in the universe is "cunt." So... I really don't like it with boys mess with my friends. At all. Especially girls who have been shit on in the past and really deserve better. My best friend had this whirlwind romance with this guy from Ireland. He seemed like a wonderful guy. He was very successful in his life, he was gorgeous, he was taller than her (which apparently is hard to do), he said all the right things, he was charming... his only fault was that he lived in another country. For a year, they were making it work. She would go there, he would come here... everything was fine. She applies to grad school in Ireland, and gets wait-listed for two years. All of a sudden, after months of "I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you" it turns into "By the way, I don't want you to ever move to Ireland, and I'm never moving to the United States." and "I love you... but more like a sister or a friend." Oh yeah, and he was too much of a coward to call her and tell her... he wrote her an email, and sent her a text message that said "Hey, I sent you an email... let me know what you think." I THINK YOU'RE AN ASS, THAT'S WHAT I THINK! Jeez.

The worst part is...he wants to still be friends, and she said no fucking way, buddy. I don't want to talk to you, I don't want to hear from you, I don't want any contact from you. We aren't friends. Not happening. So he keeps emailing and texting her, because apparently he thinks that's ok. He won't call her though, since she doesn't want to talk to him. But texting is ok. Why are men so stubborn and delusional!??? I really want to yell at him, but I'm not allowed to. And now... five days after the "I love you like a sister" she gets an email from the school telling her someone dropped the program, and she starts classes in two weeks. So she's now moving to Ireland...in twelve days from now. Luckily the Irish jackass lives on the opposite end of the country. She'll be on the southeast corner and he'll be on the northwest corner, so it isn't like she'll run into him. Unless he does it on purpose. Which honestly, I wouldn't put it past him.

Here's what I think happened: I think that he really does/did whatever love her... but once she wasn't moving there, he panicked and dumped her before HE got too attached. Nevermind the fact that she's been head over heels in love with the guy for like 8 months. And now he realized that he made a big mistake and is trying to make up for it. The funny thing is... in his breakup email (which is so impersonal) he told her that he's known for about 6 months that he wanted to break up with her...but thought that she deserved at least a year, so he told her EXACTLY A YEAR TO THE DAY when they met. So now she can remember August 16th as the day that she first met basically the first guy she's ever loved IN A CASTLE IN IRELAND, as well as the day that he destroyed her heart. What a winner he is. I hope he's lonely for the rest of his damn life.

It's over! (you know...said like Strongbad)

Oh thank GOD I'm home. I love New York and all... but dear Jesus I'm never ever ever moving there ever. It is too emotionally exhausting... too hectic... too...just too. The show went well. We got some pretty good reviews. I highly doubt we'll get extended (oh yeah, a few Fringe shows get an extended run... mine won't be one of them. We'd need to sell out and get AMAZING reviews, and not just good reviews). I don't have the vacation time if we got extended, so... here's hoping!! Plus we have two people from LA, one from DC, and one who was from DC but she's moving in Chicago in like a week... so... it'd be difficult.

I'm not allowed to go into Sephora anymore. I may have gotten a little too excited that I could get things like Tarte, and the new Kat Von D make up, (which is so pretty...) and Cargo, and philosophy, and Fresh... and more stila and BE than Ulta has. It was really exciting. And I'm weak. I'm a weak weak individual when it comes to shopping and cosmetics. I also may or may not have bought a REALLY cute eyeliner from MAC at Macy's. AND I was excited to discover that MAC eyeshadows and eyeliners are LESS THAN URBAN DECAY. That was amazing to me. Although... I want to get a large eyeshadow palette book... and see if it's possible to depot some of my individual eyeshadows that I have from all over (MAC, Red Earth, Studio Gear, etc) and see if I can put them in there. That would make my life easier. That's why I like stila. It's all separates. The little individual eyeshadows just take up so much damn room! I need to look into that. I know it's possible.

I was, however, good and did NOT go into Lush ONCE when I was in NYC. Not once this last time. It took a great deal of effort. And the last time I was in Sephora I did NOT buy the Bourjois eyeliner that was 75% off that I really really really wanted. I was good. I haven't tried my Lush bubble bath yet... but I did try the solid shampoo (Godiva, if you're interested) and I love it. I don't use conditioner with it... because it's very moisturizing, and my hair can't take that much moisture. Even Gene used it and liked it. I also got soap from them last time (Rock Star..it's wonderful) and I love that also. I just wish it lasted longer. The only thing I've wanted to do since Friday night was take a bath... and I haven't had a chance yet. Maybe tonight. I'm just so exhausted... I think I need to be asleep by like 9:00.

The Chinatown Bus? It sucks.

This weekend... I was taking the 7:30 Double Happiness Bus (oh yeah...) from Delaware to New York. Apparently, 7:30 to these people means 8:45. It was an hour and fifteen minutes late... and I was about to have a cow. And then....they let people who were buying tickets on the bus BEFORE people who had already purchased tickets!! I was livid. So I got literally the last seat on the bus. And three different people would not let me sit next to them. Absolutely would not do it. I was a little upset. So I had to ride up to NYC in this smelly, overcrowded bus that made me want to cry. We didn't get off the bus in NYC until almost 11:30. We were supposed to be there at 10:00.

Because of that, I didn't get to meet my friend in Queens on the set of Ugly Betty. I was a little bummed. And it would have been a pain in the neck to get out to Brooklyn (Flatbush. Scary.) that time of night because the Q only runs every 30 minutes. So I stayed with Sara in her uncle's apartment... which is probably the most beautiful apartment I've seen in my life. It had two kitchens. Two. And like three bathrooms. And it was absolutely lovely and very "Manhattan." If I could live in a place like that and pay when I do in Delaware, I'd so move to New York. But i'm sure his rent/mortgage whatever is at LEAST like $4000 a month or something. The apartment had a freaking doorman! It was awesome. I wanted to move in.

The show went well... we've had a few good reviews. We actually had our best show on Saturday. People laughed at my jokes! They understood that I actually had jokes! It made me really happy. But since we've started to get a little buzz, I'm hoping we get at least one decent sized house. So far we've only had houses of like 30. The theatre holds 200. Only two more shows to go... so if you happen to be in the New York area... you should come check out Untitled Masterpiece. It's funny. I swear.

I'm a regulah New Yawka.

I've become incredibly familiar with New York in the past week. Especially Monday... when I went all over creation. First, Gene & I were staying in Brooklyn with friends of his. So we got a late start on Monday, and around 2:00 we went onto the island for lunch. Then we decided that we were going to check out the Met, since the last time we were up... the ONLY painting Gene wanted to see (at the Met) was Washington Crossing The Delaware, and it was closed. So we went to go see it. So we take the 7 across to Grand Central Station, and take the 6 up to 77th Street and walk over to 81st and 5th Ave. And we get to the Met... and IT'S CLOSED ON MONDAYS. Which I should have known, but forgot. By the time we got to the Met, it was like 3:30 or so. So we sat on a bench for like 45 minutes, and decided to try MoMA. Well, MoMA closes at 5:30 and by the time we got down to 54th street, we would have only been there for 20 minutes. So I text one of the girls in the show, and come to find out that she left her cell in a cab and some very nice man named Jim picked it up. So we took the 6 again all the way down to 33rd street because this guy lived on 36th near 2nd Ave. At this point it's 5:30. Then we take the 7 back over to the other side of town, and then take the 1 from 42nd St down to Penn Station.

We were supposed to meet up with Colleen at this point because she was coming into Penn Station around 7:00. Well, we missed her... so we got on the R and took it down to by NYU because she was seeing a show down there off of Lafayette St. We ended up missing the show and didn't know what time it would be over, so we decided to walk to the bar we'd been hanging out in (it's a great bar... if you're ever in NYC check out WXOU Radio Bar on Hudson St.). Gene called his friend Nico who said the bar was right down the street, it wouldn't be a long walk at all. Almost an hour later, we got to the bar. It was an HOUR walk. Almost THIRTY blocks. My legs were so damn tired by the time we got to the bar that after one margarita I was falling asleep and not because there was some fine tequila in that fab margarita. So, Monday sucked.

Other than that, I had a fab time this past run. The show went fairly well... people laughed at us (we want them to laugh)... all 40 of them. I'm just hoping that the director doesn't shoot me.. because I chopped off my hair. Most of it. It's about 4 inches shorter... much thinner and sleaker... and kinda shaggy. I love it. It takes some getting used to. BUT my hair has SO much more body with this cut than it did before! I'm super excited.

New York Minute... trip #1

A of all... I finished reading Breaking Dawn. And it was fantastic. I wouldn't have had it any other way, and I surprisingly didn't sob like a baby. I'm rereading them now with Gene (because he won't read them on his own, but wants to read them). I actually had a lovely time finishing up my book yesterday sitting in Bryant Park just outside of Times Square before I headed off to the West Village for tech. It was very relaxing.

Not relaxing...having to carry your kinda heavy dufflebag all over New York for two days. My forearms are SORE. As are my legs, mainly from walking up and down a whole lotta steps. By the end of this Fringe thing.. I'm going to have awesome arms and great legs. I can feel it.

I had a lot of firsts in my mini New York "vacation" this weekend. I went to Queens for the first time, I managed to get on a subway by myself for the first time without getting lost, I went to the West Village and Greenwich Village for the first time (I would have liked to explore more, but I didn't have time to), and I also took my very first cab ride from Greenwich Village to Midtown so I could catch my bus home in time. I really liked Queens, but now that I'm a homeowner... I don't think I could ever live there. My mortgage for my three bedroom two story rowhouse is just about the same as my friend's rent for the smallest one bedroom apartment I've ever seen in my life. It's quite charming and lovely, but it is TINY. I'm excited to go back this weekend and have Monday all to myself instead of getting in Sunday, being exhausted, walking around for about two hours on Monday, then having to go to the West Village, tech for two hours, cab ride to Midtown, bus home. That was exhausting.

I was bad in New York though. I went to Sephora and got some eyeshadow that I can't get at ULTA, as well as some philosophy. Purity Made Simple = my new favorite face wash. It actually got my fusion mascara off, and NOTHING gets my mascara off!! I also got a nail file because my finger broke, so that was a necessity. Then before I went on the bus, the producer of my show, Sara, took me to Lush... which is this soap/cosmetics/bath stuff store, and everything is homemade and all natural. Even the packaging, which they only use when they have to. I got this sea face scrub which I used this morning and it was very nice. It is an expensive store though. Most intriguing thing I saw at Lush: a bar of shampoo. As in solid shampoo. That looks like a bar of soap. But it's shampoo. Weird.

Name Game (stolen from Becklette)

YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Lizzie Lumina (I like the alliteration!)

YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of last name)
G-Pol

YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
Violet Yorkie

YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Frances Secane

YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
Polgi

SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
The Red Baybreeze

NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)
Martin Gabriel

STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy)
Princess Twix

WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names )
Marie Charles

TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)
Saboe St. Louis

SPY NAME/BOND GIRL: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)
Autumn Lily

CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)
Strawberry Poloie

HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)
Poptart Dogwood

YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”)
The Knitting Lightning Tour